I’m starting to recognize that grief isn’t just something we experience when huge loss occurs in our life. It’s something we experience all the time. Sure, there are different degrees of grief.
Some grief is all consuming and feels like we are drowning.
Some grief is quiet, lingering in the back of our mind until it decides to leap forward down into our gut.
Grieving is so closely interwoven into life. It can feel like grief and life hold hands.
Grief is found in the changing of schools or the moving to new neighborhoods as kids.
It’s found in friend groups dropping us, or splitting up and never going back to how they were.
It’s found in losing those who are most precious to us.
It’s found in leaving our childhood and starting our own lives.
It’s found in recognizing the thing we wanted so badly may not be in the cards at this time.
It’s found in watching our babies grow, while also watching our parents grow older.
It’s recognizing, we too, are getting older.
Grief is a deep part of our life because time keeps ticking and we can't stop it.
Because change is inevitable.
Like a flicker of a light, things are gone and sometimes we didn’t even recognize they were ending.
It hurts and there is no way around it.
But no one ever said that beauty and grief couldn’t coexist.
Neither did they say the same about joy.
In fact, sometimes joy will take the drivers seat, while grief gets in the back.
Other times, beauty and joy are found only when we actively search for it in the grief.
When we really look we recognize some things:
The hard circumstances we have had also transformed us. The new friends we love dearly. The privilege of watching our kids grow is an absolute gift. The changing dynamics of our families in good ways. The realization of the blessings we’ve been given in this life as we look back.
We have a God who understands grief and joy hold hands, too.
He meets us in the grief and helps remind us that there is more to see. But also allows us to feel.
He holds our hand as we climb out, stronger than before.
And that process, as heavy and hard as it may be, is also beautiful.
~Kelli Bachara, The Unraveling Blog