To the Person Holding in Their Grief: Your Pain is not a Burden.
I know there is a person out there who has piles of grief buried deep within them.
They can’t pretend it’s not there, but they also haven’t given it the time and attention it needs.
Not because they don’t care…
But because they don’t want to fall apart.
They know they are needed. They know others are relying on them.
They know other people are hurting, and the last thing they want to do is burden their loved ones even more.
So, they just don’t. They don’t grieve what needs to be grieved.
They don’t feel what needs to be felt.
They stuff all the heavy stuff down, and continue to focus on the needs of others. Because if they don’t, who else will?
I find it heartbreaking that some people have to be so strong for others that they don’t ever get to show their pain, too.
They don’t get the chance to be vulnerable.
They don’t get the opportunity to cry on someone’s shoulder, because someone is always on theirs.
They don’t feel they can be open about how they are suffering, because everyone is used to them being the one holding things together.
If this is you, friend, I want you to know something:
You deserve to be heard. To be held.
You need support, too.
You are not superhuman… no one is.
God made us to need the love, support and help from others, and from Him.
You can’t keep swallowing down the pain. He calls us to shine the light on it.
And you know what else?
You might just find that there is such relief when you do.
So much freedom.
There is so much power in acknowledging what’s really going on, and you deserve to experience that.
..To feel what it’s like to share the weight with another human.
I want to encourage you to seek out the support. To be open with trusted people around you.
Or heck, work with a professional who can really help you sort through these things.
You can’t carry it all, nor are you supposed to.
Go to God with it, and go to His children, too.
Someone out there can handle sitting in grief with you.
The only way through grief… is through it.
It’s time to start your journey, friend.
Because healing is for you, too.
~The Unraveling with Kelli Bachara