The Darkness of Depression isn't too Dark for God.
Updated: Sep 27, 2020
It hit me today, as I worked with my third client in a row who said virtually the exact same thing the first two had:
Being depressed makes life so incredibly hard.
I’m not talking about sadness, although that’s hard too.
But real depression.
One of the hardest parts of depression is that it’s incredibly hard to understand unless you’re living with it.
Even as a mental health therapist, I can’t fully grasp it.
But I can certainly see the look of hopelessness in the eyes of the person sitting across from me.
I can hear in their voice the emptiness that often accompanies depression.
It’s not hard to observe that they aren’t well.
...Even though on paper, they “should” be happy.
Yet, just getting out of bed in the morning is hard.
The most basic daily tasks are exhausting. which makes the day ahead feel so dreadful.
It all feels like too much.
Motivation and passion are often missing.
Well intentioned friends will tell them to “do the things that make you happy”, in hopes that they can “snap out of it.”
But oftentimes, nothing seems like it would make them happy.
Chemical imbalances in our brain are real.
Mental illness is as a real as any other kind of illness.
But my goodness, it’s ruthless.
It’s a battle that can feel endless, because depression has this way of making people believe that they will always feel this way.
Depression is one of those things that I find myself asking, “God, where are you for these people?”
“Where are you when someone is so low?”
King David answered this question for me as I was browsing through the book of Pslams.
(It appears King David had a pretty sound understanding of suffering with something like depression.)
“Listen to my prayer, O God, do not ignore my plea; hear me and answer me. My thoughts trouble me and I am distraught. As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me. Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice.”
Psalm 55:1-2, 16-17
King David does not tell us why depression happens, but he tells us where God is when we are struggling.
He’s right there with us.
Time and time again, no matter how many times you’ve fallen into the dark hole of depression, God hears every cry, and He’s there.
I’ve seen people get better. I’ve gotten better.
I know it’s possible and I know it takes a lot of hard work and a lot of a God’s grace.
It might require medication, a lifestyle change, new thinking patterns, or a healthier environment.
But no matter how heavy depression feels, it’s still not more powerful than you.
Or maybe I should say, it’s not more powerful than Jesus’ Spirit living inside of you.
I’m not saying that depression is going to just vanish, or that it’s simply a matter of how much faith you have. No.
But I am saying you have access to Jesus.
You can do anything through Him, including continuing to fight for your life.
I hope you know your life is worth fighting for.
And that God is already fighting on your behalf, too.
You aren’t alone in the battle, friend.
Even at the darkest and most desperate places, your Savior is there, too.
There is no depth of darkness He hasn’t already conquered.
Let Him fight with you.
~Kelli Bachara, The Unraveling Blog